Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Hi honey.... are you up now? In some kind of morning routine.... eating, sleeping, playing and hopefully some cuddling?

It is gently raining here and it feels so quiet as I think of you. Today I found out your files have left China and I imagine them on a plane being transported through the skies. I have to keep reminding myself it is not you! I think you are coming. And I am so excited. So the next little wait may be awhile.

Here are Gramma and Granpa. Tonight I called them in Nova Scotia and they were watching a movie on Beijing. They think I need to tie a rope to them so they do not get lost. Imagine!

Monday, July 24, 2006

We are still waiting.... quietly and joyfully

Well there has been a delay but I wanted you to know that on the 15th of July I knew we were matched... I could feel you in my chest! I knew as I beamed with it! And since then I have relaxed into our permanence. Yahhh! And now I hear your photo may arrive early next week.
Are these the two cutest dogs in the world. They are ours.... and they are in for a big surprise when you arrive. Kirby and Lola will adore you! Night sweetie.

Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Referrals are coming!

Hi again little girl....
I just read that the CCAA is sending referrals as planned and I may see your darling little face in the next week. I am soooo excited. It looks as thought Grandma and Grandpa and your cousin Colin are all coming to greet you.
Sometime in September we will arrive and then see you in person .....and hold you.
I can't wait to start to learn who you are
what makes you giggle ... and smile... and content.
to get to know your rhythms.
Soon you and I will have time to develop a beat together.
It will take a little time but what a team we will make
much love my girl.
we are closer

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

Hi Little one!

Well ... it has been one year today since I was logged in to China's files. I thought I would be expecting a referral in Jan. and then meeting you in March! It has been a long wait and with many ups and downs. I have read and read and read and met with other adoptive parents and their children. I have finished your room and only today went to frame some of Sean's painting for your walls.

Last night I tossed and turned wondering if we were being matched today. Has the thread been tied? Seems like something has changed?

I love you .... do you know the possibility of attaching at this point. Do you know that one person can love you? Like the Little Prince and his Rose?

I am here.

the matching month

Hi You!

Here I am in the hot July heat and wondering if you are sleeping and hot too? It is the matching month and I wonder how it is done? Sometime this month someone in a china office will know to match me with you. Will they look in my eyes and see you? Or will they, as the rumours say, go by the bone structure from my face ? I acutally see some kind of logic in that. Some kind of Chinese understanding of the rhythms of generations and how we pass on stories through our bodies. How is the matching done? And in the moment that we are matched will I know? Will you?

Soon we are to meet.

I feel my little thin thread loosely floating from my heart... an unconnected heart string. Patiently waiting and occassionally flapping. Is it red? I think so. The Chinese myth of two who are destined having red threads that eventually meet each and then they are connected... to never part. Do you feel yours?

It is late as I again contemplate names? More roll of my tongue and I wait for the matching date. The time when I see your face and hear the name that you are hearing every day. The one rolling off of caretakers tongues.... shall we keep it?